Hillary Clinton Found Dead But Because Of Hoaxes Nobody Believes It

The plane Hillary Clinton was on when it went down in the Wadroskegan National Forest In Eastern Ohio has been found but the former First Lady/Senator/Secretary of State was not among the survivors. Her aide, Huma Abedin, was found 1.3 miles away impaled on a tree branch.

Apparently, as the plane broke apart, Clinton pushed Abedin into a window that had been compromised to “seal the cabin,” according to a flight attendant who made it through the ordeal¬†alive:

“She was just screaming and screaming until finally she just…broke in half…and flew through the window into the morning sky. We were anly a hundred feet up and on our way to the emergency landing but still…it was brutal.”

Clinton was killed when the drink cart dislodged and smacked her in the back of the head hard enough to remove a decent chunk of her skull. Everyone else on the plane made it alive.

The mainstream media began reporting on the incident but found that their ratings fell with every passing moment. The New York Times ran a story that was immediately flagged fake news. There have been so many hoaxes about Clinton dying that it’s not even worth people’s time to click the articles anymore.

Now that Clinton is actually gone, nobody believes it. Not that it matters. At this point, what difference does it make?

About Flagg Eagleton 594 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.