Donald Trump made it clear today that Mexico will be paying for the wall he just asked Congress for the money to build. The magnificent structure, which will have to be 2000 miles long, 20 feet high,12 feet deep and extend 3 miles into 2 oceans to be effective, should be completed sometime in the next year or so.
The cost to taxpayers will be nearly a trillion dollars, but it doesn’t matter, because Donald Trump has promised that Mexico will pay, and Donald Trump always makes good on his promises. In a tweet this morning, Trump already came up with a brilliant name for the new wall, taking some of another country’s glory in the meantime:
The dishonest media does not report that any money spent on building the Great Wall (for sake of speed), will be paid back by Mexico later!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 6, 2017
Take that, China! Their wall, which is mostly built across mountainous terrain and doesn’t actually do anything anymore, wil no longer be the “Great Wall” people will talk about, even though it’s a marvel of ancient engineering and viewable from space. When people think of a “Great Wall” from now on, they’ll be thinking of Trump’s wall on the southern border. To celebrate, Trump coined a new phrase in a ceremony at Trump Tower:
“When I build it, they won’t come.”
Brilliant! Our next commander-in-chief isn’t just a savvy businessman and a much better board member than Arnold Schwarzenegger, he’s also a quick-witted and original comic. The next four years are guaranteed to be glorious.
Trump may also have named his wall after his favorite dumpling cart at the corner of 5th Ave right by Trump Tower. someone mentioned that the phrase he coined may have been slightly plagiarized from a Kevin Costner movie, to which Trump replied, “I love Costner. and I’m suing you.”
God bless our next supreme commander. May the light of the Lord shine on him always.