BREAKING: Donald Trump Takes Out MASSIVE European Fake News Empire With One Phone Call

All across Eastern Europe, young people familiar with how the internet works have targeted what the world considers to be the easiest consumer to sell things to…The retired American conservative. In this case, they figured out that as Americans get older they come to their senses and become more conservative and began constructing social media pages and websites to lure them in by talking about conservative issues.

Then they changed their tactic. It became all about who could tell the biggest lie. Soon, these pages out of Georgia and Macedonia were pumping fake news from unreputable sources into our newsfeeds from a couple dozen different angles. President Trump, knowing that what they were doing was certainly a violation of international law, made a call to the Division of Internet Social Media Ethics and Practices and told them to put Zuckerberg on notice that not only were these sites spreading lies without a clear satire disclaimer, they were doing it at the cost of time and money and American jobs.

Zuckerberg, not wanting to mess with Trump, shut down all of the copycat pages and killed thousands of fake profiles from that region of the world. Now that is power.

When asked for clarification on how Trump did it, LLOD correspondent Skip Tetheluda was told that it was a matter of national security. After some digging, Skip reported in what he has gathered so far:

“Trump apparently needed the fake news to go away because it was convincing people he was doing things not in his power to do, like repeal Common Core. That’s one rumor.

There are people saying Trump is taking credit for something he didn’t do. Internet lore says the Eastern European pages were shut down because of the daily copyright infringement reports sent to Facebook from the liberal troll who writes all of the right-wing conspiracy satire. You can only steal for so long before you get shut down.

Of course, that’s just a rumor. It’s much more likely that Trump had this moperation shut down to protect the integrity of the America electoral process.”

Well, there you have it. Trump has gone and done what nobody could do before him and done away with the bulk of fake news on the internet.

About Flagg Eagleton 584 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.