BREAKING: Chelsea Clinton Reports Bill And Hillary Missing

Sources inside the New York City Police Department have reported that Chelsea Clinton has made an official missing persons report on her parents, Bill and Hillary. The couple has been in New York visiting Chelsea and her family for a few days.

According to Cpl Lester Tremont, the investigation is staying internal and cooperating with federal agents:

“We’re talking about a former President here, regardless of how people feel about them. We can’t have them in peril in the Big Apple.”

Tremont says the couple left Chelsea’s apartment late yesterday afternoon to visit ground zero and the 9/11 museum. They haven’t been heard from since:

“To be lost in New York is one thing, but to be lost in New York with two Secret Service Agents for more than 12 hours is unfathomable. We’re not expecting this to end up with a perfectly happy ending.”

Police and volunteers are searching hospitals and urgent care centers across the city to see if anyone has seen or heard from them. If you live in the city and have information about their whereabouts you could probably score a nice reward.

Liberals are always willing to pay good money to have their traitors returned. Just ask Bowe Bergdahl.



About Flagg Eagleton 584 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.